Archive for the ‘Cross Cultural Kids’ Category

Day one of the Families in Global Transitions conference was as great as I expected it to be! Some of the “rock stars” in the world of working with expat families are here, and it’s wonderful to hear their insights and wisdom.

Yesterday morning I attended a fantastic 3 hour presentation called, “TCKS Repatriating for University: Confronting the Challenges and Building Communities” by Tina Quick, Darci Nealeigh, and Candy Hart. I will try to briefly summarize it here.

Tina Quick, who just wrote a book on this topic, led the discussion and gave us 4 “Pearls of Wisdom” for TCKS going “home” to the country of their passport for college. It can be a much more difficult transition than anyone expects.

Pearl #!:
TCK Identity Development – TCKS need to be aware of the terms of being a TCK, the general characteristics, and hear the message before they return, even if they don’t take it in right away. Knowing they are a TCK helps them to know why they are different so that a student does not suffer from “Terminal Uniqueness Syndrome”, i.e. why am I so weird and why can’t I fit in?

Pearl #2:
Moving around and this high mobility lifestyle brings about a lot of loss and therefore, unresolved grief. There is a good way to grieve and a bad way to grieve. Her presentation included video clips of interviews with some of the college students she works with, and if you don’t believe this is an issue, then listen to the kids.

Pearl #3:
Understand the 5 stages of transition. They are:
1. Involvement
2. Leaving
3. Transition
4. Entering
5. Reinvolvement

The upshot of this is that if kids know it is going to be hard, that there will be good days and bad days, but that they can come out on the other side, they will be better able to deal with the roller coaster ride.

Pearl #4:
Most TCKS DO have difficulty fitting back in with their peers at first. First there is the dreaded question, “Where are you from?” Secondly, the TCK experiences have been so different that it is difficult for many kids to relate to them. This is not a uniquely American experience – remember, TCKs can be from any nationality, and the experience is universal. When TCKs feel like they can’t fit in with their peers, it’s important for them to find common ground and to meet their peers halfway. Everyone has a story to tell.

The second part of the presentation was led by two college students, Darci and Candy, and they talked about how they organized a TCK organization on their college campus. I was blown away by the poise, maturity, dedication, fabulous ideas, and dedication that these young woman possessed. If only more TCKs could meet for fun, mutual support, and sharing on college campuses – but in the end, it’s probably going to be up to the students themselves to organize and make their needs known.

More to come about this fabulous conference! Next – a summary of the outstanding session I heard led by Ruth Van Reken, who co-authored the seminal book on TCKs with David Pollock, The Third Culture Kid Experience. The new edition of her book is out. “Wow” is all I can say for now!

Stay tuned!

Welcome to my blog where I will be talking about important issues that families face as they move their children around the world. There are many wonderful advantages as well as challenges that come with raising global nomads. Here you will find discussion about issues that are on every expat parent’s mind – transitions and resiliency for our Third Culture Kids, planning for the next move and choosing the right school, how to best serve our children with special needs, and when boarding schools are the right choice. We also need a forum to talk about what to do when our kids struggle and things start getting rough. And lastly, we need to talk about planning for college/university and how to go through the application process.

Why join me? I am an educational consultant, but not just any ed consultant. I specialize in working with internationally mobile families as well as international students. These families face all the challenges that every other family faces, and then some. Few people “back home” really understand what it means to uproot your family every few years and start all over again in a new part of the world. Even going “home” isn’t as easy as one would think!

So when I am working with a family, we not only need to talk about the schooling issues at hand, but also how that fits into the reality of being a global nomad. There is an extra layer of complexity that we need to deal with, whether it be choosing a college, boarding school, finding solutions for the child with learning challenges, or transitioning to a new locale. The conversations are about the child and school – and so much more.

However, many of my international families are NOT on the move. Many of the students and families I work with are living and working in their native lands, yet also have concerns about their children’s education. I have worked with families from every corner of the world, and from a huge range of ethnic and religious backgrounds. Being aware of how culture affects the situation is also critically important when working with a family.

So join me on the journey as we talk about that which is most dear to us – our children!