Archive for the ‘Learning Differences’ Category

A colleague asked me that question this morning. Seems the young man she is working with is “not working up to his potential”. I see this so often that I am dropping everything to write about this very important topic.

I work with all kinds of kids, from the superstars going to top tier colleges to kids who are barely in line to graduate.

And guess what. I love them all.

Each and every one of these kids has gifts to share – if we don’t pay attention, then we are in danger of losing the kid as well as all that he/she can give to the world.

When I get a student like this, the first thing I want to know is why….why are they D students? Here are some of the possibilities:

• There is an undiagnosed or unaddressed learning issue. Has the student ever has a solid psycho-educational evaluation to find out learning strengths/weaknesses?

• Maybe the student has ADHD or other attentional issues. Did you know that anxiety is also something that might seem like ADHD but is not? Or that maybe it co-occurs with ADHD? Think about it – a student that is nervous or upset about a learning or personal situation is not going to be able to concentrate. So it’s important to tease out what’s ADHD and what’s an underlying psychological issue.

• Anxiety is paralyzing. I have seen too many bright kids who can’t think or perform when they are feeling anxious.

• Maybe the student has executive function issues going on – that is, he/she can’t find the work they did, forget to turn it in, bring the right book home to do the assignment, etc. These are the kids who can’t manage their time and are chronically disorganized. It can come along with all of the above issues, too.

• Maybe the kid is super bright – and doesn’t feel like doing work they find meaningless. Motivating these very intelligent kids is a huge challenge. And many gifted kids also have other issues such as learning disabilities, executive function problems, attentional problems, and anxiety. So they get to struggle with all of the above. Nice combo, huh?

• Then there are kids who are oppositional, or shut down, or angry, or depressed – all of these factors will interfere with learning and attitude. Big time.

• Maybe the teen is hanging out with the wrong crowd – and starting to make some poor choices. They might also be using substances to mask their feelings because it’s too hard to cope – or they don’t see any reason to stay sober.

• And maybe they are just immature. Some kids need longer to grow up.

• What if the kid is just lazy? Then what can we do to give them a reason to have ambition, hope for the future, and improved work ethic?

• Is the student in the right educational setting? Would they respond or have their needs met better in a different school? Do they need more teachers as mentors in their lives?

• Do they have the right study skills? It’s actually surprising how many kids actually don’t know HOW to study. They stare at the book but do not know how to organize information in any meaningful way that they can later retrieve from memory. I wish every student would be required to take a study skills course.

• Do they have anything they can be proud of? Any accomplishments? Abilities? Interests? Talents? I’m always looking for our “hook” so that we can capture their positive attributes.

• Here is something else I consider to be a very important factor. Because so many of my students are kids on the move, Third Culture Kids, or globally nomadic kids – whatever you want to call them – I also see kids who are struggling with cultural adjustment issues. When I work with therapists, I want to be sure they understand what it’s like to be in transition, start over, question your identity, give up your friends, etc. This is much more serious than a lot of people think. Some kids are just not ready to move forward with their lives until they work these issues out with a professional.

One thing I am convinced of is that every one of these kids can be reached. I’ve worked with all of the above and seen amazing stories of turnarounds. But what has to happen first is to get to the bottom of what’s getting in the way of success. They rarely “just grow out of it”. And by the time they do, they have missed out on many valuable opportunities. The older they are, the higher the stakes.

So back to the original question – are there colleges for D students? How about if we reframe the question – why is the kid a D student?

The best part of my job? When I get to work with the student from the first cries for help from the frustrated parents, see the teen transform him/herself over time, and then help with their college applications. This month I’ve read several essays from “my kids” that have moved me to tears as they look back and tell their stories of transformation. It just doesn’t get any better than that.

I did a brief presentation at the Families in Global Transition conference in Washington, DC, for internationally mobile families about taking special needs children overseas. These are my “top 5″ tips based on years of experience working with international families as an Independent Educational Consultant (IEC).

1. Do not expect that international schools will always offer services for children with learning disabilities. Furthermore, even though the school may be known as “the American school”,  American schools overseas do not have a federal mandate of IDEA to provide special education services like they would in the United States.

2. Many children with learning disabilities also need other wrap-around services, i.e. physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech and language therapy, that may or may not be available overseas. This must be investigated.

3. Those who offer services are often expats themselves – if you identify their services, they may not be there when you arrive, or may not stay in the foreign location for the entire time of your stay, or have openings for new students. Check before going.

4. Some families realize their children are struggling after they arrive. Sometimes this is due to transition and resiliency issues, so you want to give things time to settle down. However, it is also important to get these students a quality psycho-educational evaluation as early as possible. The younger a child is when his/her needs are identified, the more effective the intervention can be. Do not wait too long before getting help.

5. The most successful students are those whose parents are extremely well-informed and pro-active – researching options, finding resources, getting their kids help, and if no adequate resources are there at that location, then a boarding school that specializes in learning differences, or offers support to students with learning differences, may be a viable option.

Here are more articles on this topic, or go to http://www.rebeccagrappo.com/articles_blog.html.

Taking a Special Needs Child Overseas? What to Know Before You Go

Special Needs and Schooling Abroad

Feel free to contact  RNG International Educational Consultants if you have concerns about a young person in your life.

Today I just finished reading a college essay written by one of my students about coping with learning differences in an international school that refuses to acknowledge or accept learning disabilities in its students. In her poignant essay, this B/C student writes about how hard she worked to keep up with the other students, and feared being “discovered” and expelled based on her learning needs. The blow to this hard-working young woman’s self-esteem was so forceful that she almost did not want to apply to college at all. Knowing that she has written brilliant essays by herself, learned the meaning of hard work and perseverance, and finally hit the “submit” button on the applications almost moves me to tears. We’ve come a long way in our work together.

This story will have a happy ending. I’m happy to say that almost all of my students (touch wood) have had a similar happy ending to their story. But many of them have zigged and zagged along the way, and their struggles started early in childhood. This morning I read a touching blog at Smart Kids with LD by Jonathan Mooney called “Second Grade Terrors” in which he describes feeling sick with fear when asked to read aloud as a second-grader. For this dyslexic child, it felt like a public humiliation. To avoid the situation he would get up, ask to go to the bathroom, cry, and feel like he was choking. He writes that sometimes he even thought about suicide.

Jonathan Moody’s story had a happy ending, too. As an honors graduate from Brown University,  he and his friend, David Cole, co-authored a book called Learning Outside the Lines: Two Ivy League Students with Learning Disabilities and ADHD Give You the Tools for Academic Success and Educational Revolution.

Today Jonathan Moody is a motivational speaker and has founded a non-profit organization to advocate on behalf of individuals with learning disabilities. This story and book are not only practical, but inspirational.

Learning Center Offices at one American university

To those schools who say, “We don’t take students with learning disabilities because we are college prep,” I have this to say. In the United States, any college or university that receives federal money has support for students with disabilities. Even at an Ivy League school like Brown. Students with learning disabilities can and should go to college if that is their dream and they are motivated to achieve it.

Jonathan is now spending his life drawing attention to and advocating for these kids. I understand that there are multitudes of children in the United States whose learning needs are not being addressed. I see this with my students coming from international schools, too. This problem is global. As imperfect as the special education system in the United States is at times, at least it is a federal mandate. Students in international schools, even American international schools, may or may not find learning support. Far too often I see the unwanted consequences of having an unmet learning need in this internationally mobile school population.

When unidentified or unmet learning needs are coupled with frequent moves and adjustments, often these students become at risk for lower self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and feelings of inadequacy. Many of them can’t see that they, too, can go on to university. They feel different, or that they are failures.

In even more serious scenarios, I see some of these students engage in risky behaviors, or develop a mental health issue that sets them off course. Jonathan Moody describes how he felt as a second grader – imagine how those feelings would be magnified in an adolescent. He mentions in this blog that at times he thought about suicide. I can tell you that I work with pre-teens and teens who not only think about it, but act on it.

Help and support for these students is available. I have written about this before, so will not go into these options here.

These are serious issues that can have far reaching consequences on the life and future of a young person. But once identified and addressed, as demonstrated by Jonathan Moody and my student who submitted the essay today, the future can be bright and without limits.